All Hail President Hastert!

On Technorati, liberals are going all atwitter over a rumor that Patrick Fitzgerald's grand jury is close to handing out indictments against President Bush and his administration:

Although the U.S. Attorney's office in Chicago is staying silent, it is well known that Fitzgerald is digging deep into an assortment of serious improprieties among many Bush administration figures based, in part, on subpoenaed testimony provided by former Secretary of State Colin Powell.

According to federal whistleblower Tom Heneghen, who recently reported on www.truthradio.com, Powell testified before the citizen grand jury that President Bush had taken the U.S. to war illegally based on lies, which is a capital crime involving treason under the U.S. Code.

"Regarding the Powell testimony, there is no comment," said Sanborn.

However, sources close to the federal grade jury probe also allegedly told Heneghen a host of administration figures besides Bush were also indicted, including Vice-President Richard Cheney, Chief of Staff Andrew Card, Cheney Chief of Staff I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby, Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez, former Attorney General John Ashcroft, imprisoned New York Times reporter Judith Miller and former Senior Cheney advisor Mary Matalin.

Oh my, this is too rich. A Bush indictment, along with indictments Vice President Cheney, and what seems to be the majority of his administration? While this is obviously a left wing dream, I think we can probably take this with an ocean or two full of salt.

Why? For starters, "federal whistleblower" Tom Heneghen is the same credible source that maintained MI6 secret agent (and U.S. Senator) John Kerry was being blackmailed after being caught making snuff porn in England with underage girls. It wasn't bad enough Kerry was being accused of making snuff films, you see, but with underage girls. You know, because violent sex driven murder films just aren't enough of a reason to blackmail a British secret agent moonlighting as a United States Senator.

Heneghen is also the same person that claims the 9/11 attack on the World Trade Center in New York was just a coverup for a gold heist like in Die Hard III, and that the "missile shield" over D.C. was disarmed before the 9/11 attacks. And yes, as you proably have figured out by now, the Illuminati are involved.

So, while I'm sure you guys on the left are pre-orgasmic in your wishful thinking, I wouldn't enjoy it too much, as it is almost assuredly a bogus story...

Unless of course, President Hastert, Karl Rove (who somehow went from being the focus of the Plame investigation for liberals a few weeks ago to completely uninvolved here), and the Illuminati might just want you to think that.

Better put on your seatbelts and grab that protective headgear; it looks like it is going to be a long August.