Conffederate
Confederate

May 04, 2007

Virus Alert

Vast swathes of the Internet are mysteriously down today, affected by a peculiar virus specifically targeting keyboard drivers at university women's studies programs, academic journals, and certain political Web sites around the world. The virus corrupts specific DLLs and renders keyboards inoperable.

The virus appears to be emanating from a specific CNN.com Web server.

Computer users from these locations loose the ability to use their keyboards after viewing this particular story, where al Qaeda terrorists attempted to turn a all-girls school under construction north of Baghdad into a giant bomb.

The virus, dubbed "Cognitive Diss," does not yet have a patch developed, though antivirus teams are said to be hard at work.

Posted by Confederate Yankee at May 4, 2007 11:50 AM
Comments

Am I missing a punchline? I find no information on this.

Posted by: mekan at May 4, 2007 12:45 PM

Yep, you missed it, though it might be my ability to deliver satire is simply below par.

American feminists, if they were truly liberal, and truly feminist, should be outraged over the Islamist targeting of a girls school by al Qaeda.

The often violent oppression of women by radical Islam should be a natural intellectual battlefield for them, but their hatred of one man (Bush) far outweighs their support of millions of oppressed women, and so they sit, mouths wired shut.

This post was an satirical attempt to explain that not-really-feminist silence.

Posted by: Confederate Yankee at May 4, 2007 01:02 PM

I for one kind of welcome the silence at least they aren't blaming Bush for planting the bombs (yet). Of course they'll find some rethuglican-penis-wielding-womb butcher to blame, it's just a matter of time...

Posted by: phineas g. at May 4, 2007 01:19 PM

I've done a complete scan and I'm clean.

Posted by: TourPro at May 4, 2007 01:46 PM

phineas g., they don't need to look any farther than President Bush. The line will be something like 'if he hadn't started this illegal war those poor freedom fighters wouldn't have had to plant bombs in a girls school to drive out the baby-killing American oppressors.' Ten to one Rosie is sputing something like that already.

Posted by: Retread at May 4, 2007 02:10 PM

It only takes 4 days for CNN to pick up on a MNF-I press release I did a blog post on the day it came out.

Heh, I scooped CNN ;->

Posted by: Purple Avenger at May 4, 2007 05:01 PM

Nah CY, you are on the nose. My attempt at the straight man, not that there is anything wrong with that, was a bit lame.

No information because the keyboards were broken due to the virus.

Posted by: mekan at May 4, 2007 07:35 PM

Ha.

Posted by: dmarek at May 5, 2007 01:37 PM