October 16, 2007

Newton Was a Fascist

Air America's Jon Elliott quickly succumbed to paranoia last night, claiming that his fellow Air America host Randi Rhodes would be out of work because of an attack that he claims was more than a mugging:

Elliott was extremely agitated when he reported on the incident. He opened his show by saying "it is with sadness that tonight I inform you that my Air America colleague Randi Rhodes was assaulted last night while walking her dog near her New York City home."

Pointing out that Rhodes was wearing a jogging suit and displayed no purse or jewelry, Elliott speculated that "this does not appear to me to be a standard grab the money and run mugging."

"Is this an attempt by the right wing hate machine to silence one of our own," he asked. "Are we threatening them. Are they afraid that we're winning. Are they trying to silence intimidate us."

The problem with this theory, other than Elliott's delusion of relevance, was the fact that Rhodes wasn't mugged, and wasn't assaulted. She fell.

Meet gravity, ladies and gentlemen: the newest member of the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy.

Posted by Confederate Yankee at October 16, 2007 01:59 PM

I'm certain Shrimpy Bu$hitler or Darth Cheney is actually to blame for this. How do we know it wasn't Haliburton that built the sidewalk where she tripped?

And clearly, the sidewalk was split and cracked due to excessive weathering caused by global warming. All of this wouldn't have happened if Dumbya's Supreme Court stooges hadn't stolen the election from Gore.

Posted by: ExUrbanKevin at October 16, 2007 02:07 PM

Hi, Gravity!

Posted by: km at October 16, 2007 02:09 PM

Air America is still on the air?

Posted by: Jimmy's Attack Rabbit at October 16, 2007 02:20 PM

Why in the world would Elliot believe the Right wants Rhodes silenced? Most on the Right love Randi Rhodes! The more she talks the better, it only reinforces how unglued many on the Left have become. Elliot's reaction to the supposed mugging only amplifies that point. More please.

Posted by: mindnumbrobot at October 16, 2007 02:32 PM

Mindnumbrobot, it was very wrong of you to reveal that. You are hereby drummed out of the VRWC for treason.

The rest of you, carry on with getting the leftoids spinning. Don't stop until they're at 15,000 RPM and screaming.

Posted by: BlacquesJacquesShellacques at October 16, 2007 02:55 PM

Anyone want to lay odds on
a)how long it takes talking radio to correct this post and
b) how its all the evil conservatives fault anyway?

Posted by: Ryan Frank at October 16, 2007 02:59 PM

Fell? Are you certain she wasn't pushed?


Posted by: Retread at October 16, 2007 03:00 PM

I liked it better when he was a guitarist.

Posted by: Dan Irving at October 16, 2007 03:40 PM

I always knew Rove could bend space-time to his will....

Posted by: Techie at October 16, 2007 04:06 PM

Look, it could've worked.

Posted by: Banjo at October 16, 2007 05:15 PM

It is my understanding is that the sidewalks in NYC are part of the VRWC.

Posted by: David at October 16, 2007 05:35 PM

Everyone knows that gravity in NYC is contracted out to Blackwater. Duh.

Posted by: sickboy at October 16, 2007 06:17 PM

Elliott was extremely agitated when he reported on the incident.

Since he was reporting on his radio show, is there an explanation for how anybody found out about it?

Posted by: VRWC Agent at October 16, 2007 09:52 PM

Makes perfect sense.

Success in Iraq = defeat.
Taking more money from hard working Americans = the road to prosperity.
Insulting one of our allies (Turkey) = good diplomacy.

Why not fall = mugging?

Posted by: C-C-G at October 16, 2007 09:55 PM

It's plausible - if she was on network that had noticable ratings and she was someone of consequence.

(I never heard of her before today.)

Posted by: MikeM at October 16, 2007 10:13 PM

Gravity can not melt steel. Did you see the way Rhodes fell down? It was straight down, like it was a planned demolition. Notice how none of the other pedestrians were injured? That just does not happen when a person falls of their own volition.

Posted by: Mekan at October 17, 2007 09:09 AM

This story points to a number of problems that the liberals have. First, as a news person or someone associated with providing information, this guy shows that they can't even get the story of an accident straight. Second, this is clearly showing delusions of grandeur in that anyone would plan to hurt one of them. Also, it implies projection, indicating that they would consider doing harm to a conservative in a similar manner. Finally, they just don't understand Bush, I doubt he could arrange for a simple mugging.

Posted by: David Caskey at October 17, 2007 10:17 AM

Finally, they just don't understand Bush, I doubt he could arrange for a simple mugging.

#$#%^ you David! I spit coffee out my nose when I read that punchline! Hope I didn't ruin my computer....

Posted by: iconoclast at October 17, 2007 11:14 AM

Ya know what the saddest part of this whole thing is? The lefties are still portraying this as an attack by some conservative, as pointed out by The Weekly Standard:

The Daily Kos diarists haven't allowed the truth behind Rhodes' accident to mitigate their anger. Kos diarist WinSmith, in a remarkably ignorant and intellectually incoherent essay even by Daily Kos standards, defended the progressive rush to judgment:

Who assassinated John Kennedy (D), Robert Kennedy (D) and Martin Luther King? Was it "liberals"? I think not When talk show personalities paint one side of the aisle as a "Fifth Column," as threatening to destroy the country from within, as threatening the very fabric of America, don't be surprised when unhinged listeners take it upon themselves to "do something" about it. So if we jump the gun and assume another unhinged "patriot" fired up by Sean Hannity's hate speech decided to "do something," it's a god damned reasonable assumption.
And they claim to be "reality-based." Posted by: C-C-G at October 17, 2007 09:25 PM

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