June 10, 2010

Lesson: Don't Attack a Kid Named "Talon," Even If You Are a Carnivore

Talon Thomas is one tough kid:

An 11-year-old boy and a 22-year-old man say they were attacked this week by foxes in southern Moore County.

The attacks happened near the intersection of Sycamore Street and Midway Road in Aberdeen.

Talon Thomas, 11, said he was bitten and scratched by the fox while walking home from school Tuesday.

"He bit me on my leg, and then I just picked him up, and I just hit his head against the road and he started kicking me in my head," he said.

Talon said he kept the fox pinned down and tried to keep him quiet so he wouldn't alert other foxes.

"He kept kicking his legs up and I thought his whole family was going to come after me," he said.

Talon caught the fox and took him to his parents. It's not yet known if the fox was rabid but Talon received a series of rabies shots as a precaution.

Read the first sentence of the last paragraph again.

Talon caught the fox and took him to his parents.

I guess you should also read the part where he decided to pick the fox up when he was attacked, and slammed his head against the road.

Most people attacked by a toothy, clawed carnivore, would attempt to escape the area.

Talon Thomas is not most people.

Feel free to post Talon Thomas Facts in the comments.

Posted by Confederate Yankee at June 10, 2010 08:14 AM

"It is considered a great accomplishment to go down Niagara Falls in a wooden barrel. Talon Thomas can go *up* Niagara Falls in a cardboard box."

Posted by: arb at June 10, 2010 08:42 AM

"Meanwhile, In Aberdeen, North Carolina...

Posted by: Robert at June 10, 2010 08:52 AM

I blame FoxNews.

Posted by: Silrette at June 10, 2010 09:04 AM

"Talon Thomas" is just an alias of Jack Bauer's!

Posted by: Earl T at June 10, 2010 09:30 AM

Offspring of Chuck Norris?

Posted by: David at June 10, 2010 10:23 AM

Honey, we grow real men down South.

Posted by: MissTammy at June 10, 2010 12:38 PM

Obama needs to enroll in the Talon Thomas ass kicking school. A little child--or a Portuguese Water Dog shall lead him.

Posted by: Mike Myers at June 10, 2010 12:44 PM

I am afraid old Talon has rabies. Foxes don't attack. We have several in our area and they stay well away from humans.

Posted by: David at June 10, 2010 01:37 PM

Talon Thomas doesn't have time to bleed

Talon Thomas once bit a snake, before it could bite him

Talon Thomas apparently thinks Foxes are pack animals....but he is only 11

Talon Thomas...when you absolutely postively need to have a specimen to give to the hospital to test for rabies

Posted by: SHAWN OH at June 10, 2010 02:18 PM

Talon is so tough he uses the whole earth as a weapon.

Posted by: joe at June 10, 2010 02:40 PM

Talon Thomas once round-house kicked a fox so hard it's great grandchildren were born with concussions.

Posted by: Dubya Bee at June 10, 2010 06:59 PM

Oh, I'm sure the fox was rabid, they're shy creatures as a rule.

Posted by: MissTammy at June 11, 2010 11:54 AM

Sure the fox had rabies. That's why Talon had to smash its head on the ground, to "get it's mind right".

The rabies tried to infiltrate Talon through the bite wound, but Talon's white cells roundhouse kicked them into primordial goo.

Posted by: Gus Bailey at June 11, 2010 12:10 PM