Quick Takes, February 24, 2011

ITEM: Jake Tapper of ABC News quizzed new Obama Press Secretary Jay Carney on the debt and Mr. Obama’s apparently lack of understanding of basic economics.
“The president seems to think that borrowing money to pay the interest on the debt is not adding to the debt. I don’t understand that kind of math,” noted Tapper. Carney responded with happy talk about credit cards, families and “investing in the future.” He also observed that “interest payments are a major portion of our long-term debt.” Hopefully, Mr. Carney, on behalf of Mr. Obama, will eventually come to the realization that the Pope is Catholic.

ITEM: Here we go again (still?)! Appearing before a Senate hearing on Feb 16, Director of National Intelligence James Clapper demonstrated, if this is humanly possible, even less knowledge about the Muslim Brotherhood and the Middle East than he displayed when he called the MB a “secular” organization that has “eschewed violence.” “It’s hard at this point to point to a specific agenda of the Muslim Brotherhood as a group,” he observed, according to ynet news.com. Regarding the MB’s position on smuggling weapons to Hamas in Gaza, Clapper noted that he didn’t know the groups declared stance and that a “wait and see” attitude was necessary to determine its position on Iran. Riiiiiiight.

I’m a high school teacher, which gives me a substantial advantage over Mr. Clapper and his analysts in that I, apparently unlike them, can read. And reading the MB’s charter, I have determined, without waiting and seeing, that they want to kill all Jews, all non-Muslims, establish Sharia and a world-wide caliphate, and they are willing to do whatever is necessary to accomplish those goals, particularly if it involves rape, mutilation, buckets of blood and all manner of other barbaric violence, which they have, Mr. Clapper’s notions to the contrary, not “eschewed.” Who uses words like that anyway? I’m an English teacher and I don’t, at least not in normal conversation. I can also make an educated guess that they’re pretty much OK with giving weapons to fellow Muslim fanatics and are equally happy to deal with and support Muslim fanatic nations. Can I be the Director of National Intelligence now? I’m as qualified as Mr. Clapper or Mr. Panetta, probably more.

ITEM: Is this revolting enough for you? Reports are coming in around the nation that Chevrolet dealers are charging over $65,000 for the Chevy Volt, which is available in very limited numbers in only a handful of states. The MSRP is $41,000. GM spokesmen have professed GM’s complete lack of ability to do anything about the price gouging. Well, that’s what happens when you build a people’s car. I mean after the $7500 government tax subsidy for which we are all paying, the Volt now costs only $57,500! Could the government subsidized electric vehicle story get any better? Any more egalitarian? Power to the people, right on!

ITEM: Just when you thought Democrats couldn’t be any more self-serving and corrupt, comes news from Madison, Wisconsin of doctors (here)--apparently actual physicians--standing on street corners and writing excuses for teacher/protesters to use in defrauding the public for their illegal and immoral abandonment of their students. Be honest now, would you want your child to be taught by a teacher so bereft of moral fiber that they would illegally skip school and commit fraud to try to avoid punishment for what they know to be illegal, immoral behavior? Better yet, would you seek treatment from a physician with such politically flexible medical ethics? Wouldn’t you eschew them? Sorry. Couldn’t resist.

ITEM: Now that “Don’t Ask; Don’t Tell” is a thing of the past, America’s self-imagined “elite” universities are anxious to show their good will to the military and to embrace recruiters and ROTC, right? Not so much, at least not at Columbia, home of the journalism school that produces many of the denizens of the Lamestream Media. At a recent open forum at Columbia, 10th Mountain Division veteran and current Columbia student Anthony Maschek dared to challenge his fellow students to welcome the ROTC. He was called a racist--of course he said nothing remotely racist--and was jeered and laughed at. Maschek, after being shot eleven times, spent two years in military hospitals recovering. Those mocking him should be forcibly introduced to the wonders of living in certain people’s republics that share their low opinion of heroes like Maschek. But waaaaiiit a minute? It wasn’t all about the military being mean to gay people after all? Say it ain’t so!

ITEM: This is a rejected “Twilight Zone” script, right? The McDonough 35 High School in New Orleans has been infested with--bats (here). You know, the fly-around-at-night things that make people go “AAAHHHH!” and run headlong into fixed objects? Those bats? Parents and students are not amused, and school system officials are stymied. Can you guess why! Ding! Ding! Ding! That’s right! You win the prize! They’re an endangered species, so they can’t be harmed in any way! Having to carefully capture, relocate and release the little beasties is, to put it mildly, driving school officials batty (I know, I know--I couldn’t resist). Just another example of how the nanny state oversees and enriches and our lives while simultaneously enriching our hair with bat guano. You don’t suppose some Wisconsin doctors would trundle on down to the Big Easy and write some bat excuses?

ITEM: Uh-oh. According to Rasmussen Reports, Mr. Obama’s disapproval ratings are, once again, after a brief upward bump, trending downward. Disapproving of his performance are 55% of likely voters, while 44% at least somewhat approve. Historically, any president below 50% is in trouble. Hope springs eternal, but change wounds all heels. Stop me before I mix metaphors again!

ITEM: “We Are Not Amused” Department: Gold-embossed invitations to Prince William and Kate Middleton’s April 29 wedding were recently mailed. The Queen alone invited 40 heads of state, but not Barack and Michelle Obama. Could it have something to do with Mr. Obama’s crude and ugly serial insults of Great Britain? My guess is that they’re afraid of getting gifts like the iPod full of his speeches Obama gave to the Queen, or the cheap, cheesy movies that wouldn’t play in British DVD players given to the past PM, who is, by the way, and I am not making this up, also legally blind. I wouldn’t be amused either.

ITEM: Following on the raggedy tail-feathers of Wisconsin Democrat legislators who fled to The People’s Republic of Illinois, are the equally raggedy tails of Indiana legislators, also “fleebagging” to Illinois to prevent their respective legislatures from enacting laws they don’t like, which, according to them, is virtually the Word of God or something, so moral, magnificent and un-Republican is their flight to avoid responsibility. Dems across the nation, as well as their union masters, are also gearing up to express “solidarity,” Dems such as Dennis Kuchinich (D-Ohio) who recently appeared in Olympia, WA to rally the faithful. From Rob at PACN Righty (here), Kuchnich said “You cannot have a democracy if you don’t have people in a position to be able to negotiate for their wages, and to have decent benefits.” As a public service, here is a brief primer on republican democracy:

(1) The people electing representatives based on their positions and promises: Good--republican (as in a republic) democracy.
(2) The people’s representatives debating and voting on important issues: Good--republican democracy.
(3) Entire parties fleeing the state to force their will on the state without debate and voting when they know they’ll lose: Bad--despotism (and really childish, stupid behavior. Didn’t any of these people have mothers who taught them anything about working and playing well with others? Were they raised by wolves?).
(4) Entire parties of legislators fleeing the state because they think they know better than the people and are going to prevent the people from making mistakes by means of the democratic process: Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad--raised in test tubes; not mannerly enough to have been raised by wolves.
(5) Doing everything they’re doing to make sure union thugs continue to roll in money, money which will end up in Democrat coffers: Business as usual, and criminal.

Reread and disseminate as necessary.

ITEM: And in related news, Wisconsin Republicans are taking a controversial, outrageous step to entice fleebagger Democrats back to Wisconsin to engage in, you know--voting and democracy and stuff. They’re going to pass a voter ID bill that will require voters to actually provide--gasp!--photo ID when voting. Yes, photo ID! In 2011! Identification with a photo of the voter on it! Do you have any idea how hard it is to obtain such rare documents? Why, minorities, the elderly, and “non-documented visitors” to America, to say nothing of the many, many “previously living,” would be disenfranchised! Why, that’s absurd! It’s unfair! That would almost be like, just to make a completely ridiculous comparison, an entire political party fleeing the state to prevent votes they know they’d lose. Preposterous! Anarchy! The Republicans hate the elderly, the poor, minorities, non-documented visitors, the previously living, cute puppies and kittens, and adorable union members with big, weepy eyes. Sniffle. Snort.

ITEM: And in related, related news, the Wisconsin legislature just passed a measure that suspends direct deposits for legislators playing hooky. They’ll have to collect their checks on the floor of the legislature during a normal business session from now on. Heard as a faint echo from over the Illinois border: “Uh-oh. Quick! Who’s got that union credit card?”

ITEM: And in related, related, related news, via Hot Air (here) AFL-CIO Union Boss Richard Trumka recently boasted that he visits the White House or speaks with someone within at least once each and every day. Hmmm. Does anyone find this...disturbing? You don’t suppose this has anything to do with Mr. Obama being the Union Organizer in Chief, do you? What could they be talking about? Recipes? Discuss.

ITEM: The Louis Renault Award of the Week: Rahm “Dead Fish” Emanuel has been elected Mayor of Chicago with 95% of the vote, no doubt for life. OK, OK, so maybe no one was actually, shocked, shocked! not even the previously living who almost certainly turned out in record numbers as they always do.

ITEM: The REAL Louis Renault Award of the Week: Americans were shocked, shocked! to learn that D.C. Federal District Judge Gladys Kessler, appointed by Bill Clinton, has ruled ObamaCare constitutional. Via Politico (here), here’s the soul of Kessler’s argument:

“First, this Court agrees with the two other district courts which have ruled that the individuals subject to § 1501’s mandate provision are either present or future participants in the national health care market. See Liberty Univ., 2010 WL 4860299, at *15 (“Nearly everyone will require health care services at some point in their lifetimes, and it is not always possible to predict when one will be afflicted by illness or injury and require care.”); Thomas More Law Ctr., 720 F.Supp.2d at 894 (“The health care market is unlike other markets. No one can guarantee his or her health, or ensure that he or she will never participate in the health care market. . . . The plaintiffs have not opted out of the health care services market because, as living, breathing beings . . . they cannot opt out of this market.”). Thus, the vast majority of individuals, if not all individuals, will require some medical care in their lifetime.”
Let’s see if we understand this: Because I’ll probably be sick at some time in my life, I’ll require medical care, so the Federal Government can force me to buy any kind of insurance they prefer at any cost. So, essentially, because I’m human, the Federal government pretty much owns me. Not only that, merely thinking about not buying health insurance constitutes interstate commerce, so the government can force me to buy any consumer product it prefers. Of course! Why couldn’t I see that before? Perfectly reasonable.

ITEM: It’s a Louis Renault Explosion! Via Pajamas Media (here), the world was shocked, shocked! to learn that Venezuela, which recently signed an agreement to allow Iran to build joint ICBM missile bases on its soil, has been violating U.S. Sanctions signed by President Obama by selling high grade gasoline to Iran. Mr. Obama has been too busy with important business, such as ensuring that the nationally vital Union/Democrat money pipeline remains unobstructed, to comment. But when he does, I’m sure he’ll note that the U.S. will “bear witness” to any continuing and/or future violations. That oughta do it.

ITEM: Did You Know? Department: Did you know that Milwaukee teachers demanded benefits for Viagra and similarly “uplifting” drugs, claiming that if the public failed to provide them, it would be a violation of the Wisconsin Fair Employment Act. Oh yes, that’s WFEA 12.2.39(c)2.d: “All male members of public employee unions shall be provided, at public cost, sufficient drugs to maintain a constant state of erection. They shall also be promptly provided matching bathtubs in scenic, rural locations upon request to keep said erection from breaking free and ravaging the countryside. What’s that?! EEEEEE! It sees us! It’s coming this way! Run for your lives!!!!!” Well, that sounds reasonable to me. I mean, if it’s the law and all. I always wondered what the deal with the bathtubs was anyway. I still don’t get the cheese hats.

ITEM: Mustafa Abdel-Jalil, former Libyan Justice Minister, has claimed that Muammar al-Quaddafi personally ordered the destruction of Pan Am 103 at Lockerbie, Scotland. Surely knowing this, it was only today that Mr. Obama finally spoke out about the Libyan violence calling it “outrageous” and “unacceptable.” To be fair, he also said it should stop (that’s encouraging!) and he threatened decisive action: He’s going to send Hillary Clinton to a conference in Geneva on Monday to talk about the violence.

But hey! At least he has priorities. At least he knows who America’s real enemies are, enemies like the governors of Arizona and Wisconsin. Absolutely pathetic. Surely Mr. Obama could at least offer to “bear witness”--as he did during the Iranian uprising-- to military aircraft gun runs on unarmed civilians? After all, if he doesn’t “bear witness,” we’ll have a destructive witness bearing gap.

ITEM: February 24 marks the last flight of the space shuttle program. The shuttle Discovery will have the dubious honor of the final flight. America will no longer have the means to lift human beings into orbit and thanks to Mr. Obama, no plans to do so for the future. But at least NASA will be kept busy making Muslims feel good about Algebra and combatting the threat of Global Warming which really, pretty much--doesn’t exist...

ITEM: But Don’t They Owe The Taxpayers Billions? Department: Chevrolet is going to spend $40 million over the next five years. To pay back taxpayers? New car designs? Brilliant new technology? Nah. Carbon offsets. For those unaware of the scam--er, term--carbon offsets work like this: Let’s say you’re an environmentalist weenie, but you’re just barely rational enough to realize that you need a car to get to work. Still, you feel oh-so-guilty about each and every drive you’re so unfairly and brutally forced to make. What to do? You pay a private company--and this, ladies and gentlemen, is largely how Al Gore made his megabucks--to “offset” your carbon use to expiate your guilt! How do they do that? Why, by promising to plant some trees somewhere, sometime, or by promising to do some research into or encouragement of magical green technology or stuff, you know? And is there any way to be sure the people who took your money and gave you absolution actually do what they promised to do? Nope. Government oversight? Nope; like the Obama Administration would do that anyway! Hahahahaha! Don’t the taxpayers have a 61% share of GM, which, has not, in fact paid back it’s TARP bailout funds? Yup. But at least some execs at Chevy will receive green absolution. What’s more important than that?

ITEM: But He Was Moving To the Center! Department: Not so much. After giving lip service to opposing gay marriage for the last two years, Mr. Obama, in the best Emily Litella tradition, has said “never mind.” An Obama spokesman has noted that Mr. Obama now believes the Defense of Marriage Act to be unconstitutional and has directed the Justice Department to stop defending it. Wails of anguish and outrage were heard coming from Justice Department offices. OK, OK, so I made that last part up.

ITEM: Via Fox News, in Little Rock, AK, McClellan High School algebra teacher Solana Islam has resigned her position after being convicted of prostitution and operating a business without a license. Well. Prostitution is one thing, but operating a business without a license? That’s just over the line!

And on that happy note, thanks for dropping by and I’ll see you next Thursday!