Quick Takes, April 28, 2011

ITEM: Is This Cool Or What? Department: Go here for an article about a successful test of quantum teleportation. Remember the transporter of the Star Trek series, or the Asgaard “beaming” device of the later episodes of the Stargate SG1 series? That’s essentially what’s happening. Quantum information, in the form of light, has been essentially in two places at once, destroyed in the first, and rematerialized—intact—in the second. Unbelievably cool. The immediate potential application is for unimaginably fast and powerful computers, possibly powerful enough to be capable of finding Barack Obama’s college grades.

ITEM: Is This Cool Or What II? Department: Scientists at the Large Hadron Collider at CERN have announced (here) the possibility of finding “The God Particle,” the Higgs Boson. If so, this will be one of those truly revolutionary moments in science with profound effects for mankind. We live in interesting times indeed.

ITEM: We recently received a cookbook from Dinner With Warriors, an organization selling the cookbook to benefit members of our military who have been wounded in action, and the survivors of those who have fallen. The cookbook, of the same name, contains 96 recipes of all kinds, each accompanied by a photograph and story of our servicemen and women. The cookbook is well made and the recipes varied and interesting indeed. Go here for more information.

ITEM: Louis Renault Award, Union Edition: In last week’s QTs, we reported on the certified victory of incumbent Wisconsin Supreme Court Justice David Prosser over the union-backed candidate JoAnne Kloppenberg by a 7000+ vote margin. Unfortunately, that total was barely within the margin that requires Wisconsin voters to pay for a recount. I’m shocked, shocked! to learn that Kloppenberg has indeed demanded a recount. The chance of finding sufficient votes to overturn the result is virtually nil. Kloppenberg and her union backers must know this, so their goal must surely be political rather than electoral. But stay tuned. Who knows how many of the voting dead may cross the border from Illinois? Go here for the story. For a legal take on the issue, go here.

ITEM: Mr. Obama’s mean, petulant streak is never far from the surface, and surface it did (here) in a brief interview with a local Texas newsman. Not only did he demonstrate his continuing, debilitating lack of knowledge about history by claiming that Texas has always been Republican(?!)--That certainly would have been news to LBJ and Texas Dems until the election of George W. Bush--but he chastised the reporter for not being appropriately obsequious. Mr. President, it’s never smart to mess with Texas and while “petulant” and “presidential” are alliterative, they don’t go well together.

ITEM: The title of Ann Coulter’s new book, due out in early June, is “Demonic: How The Liberal Mob is Endangering America.” You gotta love her, but I wish she’d be more forthright in telling us how she really feels. By the way, she publishes a new article every Thursday. It might be a good idea to visit there at anncoulter.com after visiting here first, of course. Smart, witty, beautiful conservative women! Sounds like a winning party plank to me. Hell, I’d even be willing to allow the government to subsidize that instead of the Chevy Volt!

ITEM: By Their Fruits Shall Ye Know Them Department: Liberal blogger Wonkette has often contributed to the lack of civility so common in our social discourse. You know, the kind progressives live to criticize and stamp out? What’s that? It was all a lie? They never really meant it? Notify the Louis Renault Prize Committee! So why are we mentioning her? She has achieved the near-impossible, and has now descended even lower than the floor of the Marianas Trench (extra credit for depth and location--at the end of the QT. No fair peeking!) by crudely ridiculing Sarah Palin’s Down’s Syndrome-afflicted son on the occasion of his third birthday. Yes, there’s nothing quite like picking on people like Trig Palin to establish one’s humanity and progressive street cred. Go here for the story, but take your blood pressure medication first.

UPDATE: Wonkette has apparently made a sort of “apology.” Go here to see it. If you don’t currently take blood pressure medication, this will likely provoke it. Is it possible to actually reason with--to say nothing about negotiating with--such people? Such is the result of long-term exposure to Progressivism. Discuss.

ITEM: When You Look Into The Abyss, The Abyss Looks Into You! Department: From Fox News (here) comes the sad tale of DHS Assistant Secretary for Public Affairs Sean Smith who threatened to decapitate members of his own organization. That’s right, one of the Department of Homeland Security’s top public relations officials threatened to cut off the heads of coworkers. Isn’t that what Jihadists are supposed to do? Oh well. At least he’s leaving the DHS. He’s apparently been staring into the abyss too long. Janet Napolitano could not be reached for comment, but if she could, I’m sure she’d say that things were better than ever in the DHS, apart from a few decapitations, of course. I wonder if the Jihadist’s union knows that DHS management is trying to take over their jobs? Notify the NLRB!

ITEM: Also from Fox News (here) comes the news that the Holder Justice Department intends to seek the death penalty for Abd Al-Rahim Al-Nishiri, charged for the bombing of the USS Cole which wounded 40 sailors and killed 17. Reflect, gentle readers, on the fact that, under the Obama Administration, such a routine charging decision in the case of a mass murderer and terrorist has become so remarkable. Discuss.

ITEM: Oh Goody! Department: From CNBC (here) we learn that the possibility that gasoline prices could increase to as much as $6.00 per gallon by this summer is real indeed. Of course, none of this is Mr. Obama’s fault, nor does he have any power to do anything about it. Just ask him; he’ll tell you. As a matter of fact, he’s constantly telling you even if you haven’t asked. George W. Bush did it! That’s the ticket!

ITEM: Unintended (?) Consequences! Department: Go here for what you’ve known was coming. That’s right! Compact fluorescent light bulbs, you know, the miracle energy saving bulbs that contain Mercury, one of the most poisonous substances known to man? And you know how you have to call out the EPA for a Super Fund clean up if one breaks? Well, now we know that they emit cancer-causing chemicals too! Could our green future be any brighter--or more carcinogenic?!

ITEM: Art Imitates Life! Department: Remember that delightful scene in the Austin Powers film when Dr. Evil is annoyed because his associates cannot provide “sharks with fricking laser beams on their heads,” providing only ill-tempered Sea Bass instead? Consider this recent comment from Barack Obama: "You know the Oval Office always thought I was going to have like real cool phones and stuff. I'm like 'come on guys, I'm the president of the United States.' Where's the fancy buttons and stuff, and the big screen comes up? It doesn't happen." He’s an evil president!

ITEM: You’re a stockholder in a company that has seen a 57.6% drop in income in the first quarter, to $5.4 million from $12.8 million during the same quarter a year ago. What do you do? Well, if you’re the New York Times (here), you keep cranking out the same tripe that put you in that position in the first place. Not to worry though, shareholders! I’m sure the NYT can be sold, like Newsweek before it, for at least a dollar. What’s that? Sidney Harmon, the stereo magnate who bought Newsweek for a buck recently died? Uh-oh...

ITEM: Self-Delusion On A Mass Scale! Department. Go here for an article in The New Republic that seeks to explain why the Green Movement has been such a failure. There is much hand-wringing and angst over why Cap and Trade and other green initiatives have failed. It’s fascinating in that they cannot bring themselves to consider that “Climate Change” is essentially a crock. Such thinking is not possible for them. It’s an interesting, if slightly disturbing, look into the Progressive mind.

ITEM: Can’t See The Forest For The Trees! Department: A group of California politicians, including Lt. Gov. Gavin Newsom, recently traveled to Texas (here). To try the BBQ? Attend a rodeo? Attend a Cowboy’s or Ranger’s game? Nope. To try to figure out why all of their businesses are leaving California and moving to Texas. Hmm. This is a tough one. Could it be because in California, businesses are constantly harassed by bizarre regulations, exorbitant taxes, insane zoning regulations, constant lawsuits from a plethora of looney-toon lobbying groups, and a skyrocketing cost of living for their employees? Why yes, I do believe the answer is “E:” All Of The Above. And they had to go to Texas to figure that out?

Actually, none of this is surprising. Many self-styled “elite” West and East coastal dwellers really do believe that everything between is a vast cultural wasteland where the “little people,” most of whom are Republicans who cling to God and guns, live their pathetic, racist, sexist, you-name-it-ist little lives. For the California pols it was probably akin to a safari to an exotic land. Speaking as a Texan, I was going to say that I hope they never figure it out, but I’m reasonably certain they’re not capable of finding anything they do to be erroneous. I wonder of any of them defected and requested asylum?

ITEM: A Palmetto Florida woman (here) came home to find a 6-foot alligator in one of her bedrooms. Wildlife officers eventually captured the beastie in a bathroom and released it into the wild. I don’t know about you, but I’m sick of all of this speciesist discrimination! Whatever a consenting adult wants to do with a consenting alligator in the privacy of their own bedroom, or swamp, or bathroom, or whatever should be their business, unless they want to get married, then it’s everybody’s business. Strike a blow for biological diversity and inter-species equality! I think.

ITEM: More Tales From The Religion of Peace Department: One Israeli was killed and four other wounded as they prayed at Joseph’s Tomb during Passover. Their killers, the murderers who kept firing at their vehicles even as they fled? Uniformed Palestinian police officers. Yes, the very same peace-loving humanitarians the Obama Administration has been arming and training. Go here for the whole sordid story. Remember, gentle readers, that these are the people our President reflexively supports and wants to negotiate with against our allies, the Israelis. Hope Change. Outreach. Smart diplomacy. Terrorist murder.

ITEM: From the good folks at Powerline (here): “A year ago, the conventional wisdom about Barack Obama was: a nice guy but a weak president. That has been evolving, I think. The emerging conventional wisdom is: an awful president, and not that nice a guy either. Not a great position from which to run for re-election next year.”

Hmm. I would suggest that there are a great many Americans, your correspondent included, who have said from the beginning: A cheap, thuggish hustler, a terrible, willfully destructive president, a nasty, vengeful piece of work, and a narcissistic socialist. Still, it’s good to see people catching up and catching on. I believe that it was Lilly Tomlin who said: “No matter how cynical you get, you just can’t keep up.”

ITEM: Also from Powerline (here) comes the story of Mr. Obama who has launched a Justice Department investigation into those evil oil companies and speculators, and rich people and Republicans and people mean to democrats, and everyone who didn’t vote for Obama, etc. to protect the people from high gas prices. What’s that? Produce more American oil? HAHAHAHAHAHA! You obviously lack Mr. Obama’s brilliant grasp of the realities of economics and oil production. When your own nation isn’t producing oil, when gas prices are rising, when you’re in a recession and nearly bankrupt, all truly brilliant, Nobel Prize-winning economists know that the only smart thing to to is to help Brazil produce their oil so you can buy it from them! Do visit the story for a very informative graph.

ITEM: Finally! A story about a high speed rail system-get this--in China! The Washington Post (here) has the story about the efficiency and brilliant fiscal planning that went into the system, a system routinely full of happy, satisfied...what’s that? They’re not happy? It’s not full? It’s hopelessly corrupt and losing money at an incredible rate? It’s not a story about Amtrack? Are you sure about that? You are? Darn. Oh well. Read the WaPo story anyway to see the bright future of American high speed rail. All aboard!

ITEM: Man, Am I Glad We Got Rid Of That Guy! Department: From Fox News (here) comes a story about Van Jones, the avowed communist who was Mr. Obama’s pick for “green jobs czar.” Mr. Jones is now pushing for a movement to give “Mother Nature” the same rights as human beings, enforceable by--of course--international law. It doesn’t take much imagination to envision the lunacy that would run rampant under such a regime, nor does it take much imagination to envision the Obama’s administration’s underhanded support for such insanity. Read the entire article, if you have the stomach for it.

ITEM: Well, It’s About Time! Department. From the beautiful and brilliant Michelle Malkin (here) comes news that the Obama Administration is planning to make a $2.84 billion dollar loan to upgrade a petroleum refinery. I know what you’re thinking: It’s about time! Finally, the Obamites are getting with the program to help out Americans! Not so much. The refinery is in Columbia, but that makes a kind of deranged sense. Mr. Obama is helping the Brazilians drill for oil, why shouldn’t he help the Columbians refine it so we can owe them billions that we have to borrow from the Chinese too?

ITEM: From the Microsoft Network (here) comes an apparently earnest essay about why $5.00 a gallon gas is actually good for you and America. It has to be a parody, right? Right? The next thing you know, they’ll be publishing essays about why premature death eases pressures on overburdened medical providers. What? The Obamites are already doing that? Arrgggghh!

ITEM: More Wisdom From The One! Department: So what’s the cause of high gas prices? Greedy oil companies? Evil speculators? George W. Bush? From Doug Powers at michellemalkin.com (here) comes the answer: It’s climate-change denying Republicans who won’t go along with bankrupting the nation to solve the global warming problem that is our real national security threat! Who’da thunk it? No wonder we made him president!

ITEM: From Fox News (here) we learn that after spending almost $4 billion in the preparation and permit processes to begin drilling off the northern coast of Alaska, the EPA has turned down Shell’s application, likely forcing Shell to cancel its summer drilling plans. Why? The EPA said Shell failed to include the possible emissions from an ice-breaking ship in its overall environmental impact statement. Don’t read this story unless you’re prepared for an abrupt and dangerous rise in your blood pressure and anger levels. If this kind of thing doesn’t unseat Mr. Obama in 2012, America may very well be relegated to the status of European welfare states. The problem, of course, is that there will be no one to bail us out. Rosetta Stone has a Chinese language course, don’t they?

ITEM: Honey, The Landlord Is Threatening To Evict Us! Department: From Hot Air (here) we discover that China is making very real economic threats, such as hinting that they may start retreating from the dollar and dumping their US investments. Why is this a bad thing? It will make it much harder for us to sell our bonds. After all, Japan is the next buyer in line, and they won’t be buying any for a long time to come. The Democrat high speed gravy train to oblivion is entering the gorge of doom with the washed out bridge of death, and we’re all about to face the enchilada of bankruptcy. OK, so I have no idea what an enchilada has to do with bankruptcy, but things are not looking good, sort of like a spoiled enchilada, or something.

ITEM: So That Explains It! Department. From Forbes (here) comes news that Botox may interfere with the ability to empathize. OK. So that explains Nancy Pelosi and John Kerry. Yet to be explained by science is exactly how hair plugs cause the brain to be disconnected from the mouth in people like Vice President Biden, or how smoking, golf, spending other people’s money and excessive socialism causes the sense of shame to be removed in people like Mr. Obama.

ITEM: The National Labor Relations Board is attempting to tell Boeing where it may, and may not, build airplanes. The NLRB, recently fortified by recess appointments of SEIU cronies by President Obama, is trying to keep Boeing, which has already spent billions, from opening a plant in South Carolina to build its new 787 Dreamliner. South Carolina, you see, is a right-to-work state, so no one may be forced to join a union there. SC Governor Nikki Haley is vowing to put Mr. Obama’s political feet to the fire. More here.

So let’s see if I understand this: Businesses aren’t allowed to build plants where they want if unions object? Businesses are run entirely for the benefit of labor unions, and the government, acting on behalf of unions, gets to decide? Wait a minute! Isn’t that Socialism? But Mr. Obama isn’t a socialist! He said so!

ITEM: We’re Number One! We’re Number One! Once again Forbe’s (here) has announced its “Worst Cars On The Road” list for 2011, and of the bottom eleven cars, GM and Chrysler hold nine of the not-coveted spots! No Fords were given the dubious honor. When Mr. Obama took over GM, I bought a Ford Escape and this year, a Ford Fiesta, and I’m not looking back (Dear Ford: Please feel free to provide service and repairs gratis for life. I’m in your database. Thanks!). It seems almost like precognition now. Hope. Change. Is this the part where the world respects us more?

ITEM: I’ve Seen The Future, And It’s: “Leading From Behind.” That’s an Obama advisor’s assessment of Mr. Obama’s method of leadership in foreign policy, as so ably demonstrated in Libya. Go here for John Podhoretz’s brief explication of the issue. I’m reminded of the venerable Alaskan saying: “If you’re the last dog in line, the view never changes.” The tragedy, gentle readers, is that Mr. Obama and his advisors almost certainly consider such a pithy saying to be revealed wisdom and they are determined to see that America is the last dog. Oh well. At least it’ll make a great Republican sound bite and bumper sticker in the next election.

ITEM: Tales of Smart Diplomacy! Department: It has been known for some time that it was Barack Obama who imposed the settlement freeze issue on the Palestinians, who didn’t want it in the first place, thus dooming any hope for peace. Of course, when the Palestinians raise their children on the mantra of “eat your vegetables, kill Jews, death to America,” peace tends to be a rather elusive pursuit. Visit Hot Air (here) for the whole story of how the Obama Administration has utterly botched relations not only with the Israelis, but with the Palestinians—the side they favor. The world has long ago concluded that America under Mr. Obama is an erratic and treacherous ally and a toothless enemy.

ITEM: Visit the Atlantic (here) for an interesting article on another Democrat-sponsored attempt to run roughshod over freedom in the name of political correctness. I speak of the SaVE Act, which would establish new reporting requirements for alleged acts of sexual violence on college campuses. Among the troubling provision is the establishment of a “preponderance of the evidence” standard for charges of sexual misconduct in college disciplinary proceedings. Such a lowered standard of proof is inherently un-American. Yet another Progressive “improvement” about which to be aware—and to oppose. It seems like there is a great deal of that sort of thing abroad these days, doesn’t it? Discuss.

ITEM: Q: How can you tell when President Obama is lying? A: His lips are moving. Am I being mean to Mr. Obama? He has taken, of late, to claiming that there is nothing he can do about skyrocketing gas prices, nothing except telling us to buy $41,000 electric wondermobiles and building high speed rail. Read this piece by Will Collier at Pajamas Media and decide for yourself if I’m being unfair to the President. It seems that there may be something he can do after all. A quick trip to the indispensable PowerLine (here) will add a bit more useful information.

ITEM: Have you noticed that Mr. Obama seems to obsequiously grovel to our enemies and spit on our allies, particularly Israel? Me too. Go here for an essay by Israeli Ambassador to the US, Michael Oren, which well explains why that sort of foolishness, is, well, foolishness.

ITEM: Imagine that the party in power practiced gangster government, threatening and bullying its political opponents and innocent businesses, extorting money from them, forcing out their CEOs on whims, and implicitly demanding contributions for its political campaigns. You don’t have to imagine. The Obama administration has been doing it since day one. Go here for just one of the most recent examples. The Obama Administration is giving thugs a bad name.

ITEM: Unexpected Good News! Department: Yet another state (here) has curtailed the bargaining rights of public employee unions, and expects to save $100 million in the bargain. Amazingly, the state is Massachusetts, which is wholly Democrat controlled, and it was the Democrats that passed the bill! Hmm. Perhaps imminent financial Armageddon can have the proper effect even on Dems. Who’da thunk it? A shame it doesn’t work on the socialists in DC.

ITEM: Moral Degeneracy Department: Israel builds dwellings (Washington Post editorial here) and the Obama administration goes berserk with moral outrage, forcing our best ally in the region to stop building homes for its own citizens on its own land. Syrian regime thugs massacre unarmed civilians marching in a funeral procession and the Obama Administration says and does…nothing. Tragically, this—as well as a great many other telling acts and/or omissions—says all we need to know about Mr. Obama and the moral degenerates he has hired to rule us. These people must be run out of office at the earliest possible opportunity and prosecuted where appropriate.

And speaking of moral degeneracy, Syria will soon be seated on the UN Human Rights Council (here). The UN, of course, will do nothing to derail Syria’s elevation to the pinnacle of Human Rights glory. I am, of course, engaging in world-class irony and sarcasm. After all, it’s the UN we’re talking about!

ITEM: From Hot Air (here) comes the news that our tax dollars have been spent for—wait for it—a climate change rap! I know! And they're serious too! That’s right you hippers and hoppers, now you can rap along with da feds! As a public service, Confederate Yankee provides, absolutely free of charge to the taxpayers (maybe we can get a subsidy?), our own little climate rap:

Yo! You say you wanna clean da ‘vironment, make ever’body walk?
Well, you make da energy prices skyrocket, not just talk the talk!
Obama make gas prices reach five bucks without fail,
An’ he be sayin’ “we gonna build da high-speed rail!”
And the UN be squawkin’ ‘bout meltin’ glaciers and such,
But the scientists be talkin’, sayin’ “not so much.”
And 50 mil climate refugees ‘sposed to be walkin’,
But they ain’t nowhere at all, da UN jive talkin’.
Now the CFCs be poisoning da folks,
Da bold green future, it don’t be no joke!
Chorus: Obama green! Yo! Obama Green! Yo! Da ‘bama machine, it be obscene! Obama green! Yo!
(repeat and fade)

And on that get down funky note, it’s time to thank you for stopping by and to look forward to seeing you again next Thursday!

EXTRA CREDIT: The Marianas Trench is the lowest point on the planet at 36,201 feet below the surface of the Pacific Ocean. It is near Japan.